Unlike
most Americans, trips to Washington D.C. have become a regular event for us
throughout the year as we visit the newest Aaronson – our grandson. Landing in the
city after an hour flight from the mountains of Western North Carolina always
catches me by surprise. The
skyline of the Capitol building, the Washington monument and the rooftops of
the Smithsonian and other monuments on the Mall never fail to excite me. After all, this is a world famous
national capital!
Having
just returned, we can report that unlike most of what goes on in Washington
these days, Hayden, Jessica and Austin are thriving. Just a week ago we landed at Reagan National and headed for
the Metro and the Yellow Line to Gallery Place, changed to the Red Line for the
leg to Union Station. (We do this now as if we were seasoned commuters.) After
lunch at one of the many station restaurants, we continued via taxi for the
last 15 blocks to Hayden’s house in northeast D.C. Each time we go we hope the new H Street trolley will be up
and running from Union Station north. It’s almost ready, they say. But not just yet…
The
first and most important reason for our visit was to see Austin who is almost 6
months old now. And so we walked
around the block to knock on the door of a pink stucco townhouse where Therese,
the nanny was caring for Austin and Kyle.
She was expecting us but said Austin was napping and she’d bring him around
when he woke up and so we left. An
hour later she was at Hayden’s door with a double stroller and Kyle and Austin
awake. We eagerly picked up Austin
and Therese settled Kyle and we visited.
Therese
is Rwandan – a small black, middle-aged energetic woman less than 5 ft.
tall who speaks broken English. Her eyes come alive when she smiles and she has
that African kindness and gentle demeanor that we were so drawn to when
visiting Uganda. She smiles
from the heart as she picks up each baby and cares for him as if he were hers. From
our conversation we learned she had lived in Washington for a long time and her
husband is from Benin and works as a driver for the Belgian Embassy. As she was not blessed with children of
her own she has devoted many years to caring for other people’s children – many
of whom she stayed with until they were school aged and even teens. She is organized and knows the value of
a keeping to a schedule especially when charged with two 5 ½ month old babies. Kyle and Austin share Therese and it
all seems to work well.
White and adopted from California,
Kyle is 10 days older than Austin and is more hyperactive. He lives with his
two Dads just around the corner. Therese knows each baby’s personality and she told
us that Austin is the quiet and calm one who has been nursed since birth. Kyle takes the bottle and squirms around
more.
Every two weeks Therese changes
houses. Each house is well stocked with baby equipment. Therese could just as well do without
all the American baby gadgets as she knows what babies need and they manage
perfectly well in Rwanda without all the “stuff” American parents seem to feel
is necessary. (I was continually reminded of the “used” baby things we had with
Hayden and how lucky we were to have them in Chile. Nowadays parents are told
it is unsafe to have anything used.) However, Therese does like the double
stroller for outings in the neighborhood.
At first glance Kyle and Austin in the side-by-side stroller could be
twins. Sometimes she will get Kyle to nap by swaddling him on her back African
style. Austin, on the other hand, will
happily fall asleep lulled by the motion of being pushed in the stroller.
Austin got used to us very quickly.
I was instantly mesmerized by his translucent
inquisitive large blue eyes, which seemed to serenely watch everything going on
around him. He just draws you in
with his gaze. His soft white skin
and blonde fluff on his head remind me of a “Gerber baby”. I don’t even know if
they still exist. As a grandparent, it’s lovely to simply be there and watch
Hayden and Jessica take care of him perfectly as they do. Austin rarely cries except when he’s
hungry. Then he might just give a
little mewling whine before Jessica swoops him up and “tops him off” as she
likes to joke when she puts him to her breast. He will go for hours just napping and gazing at the world,
playing with his toys on his gym mat on the floor or bouncing up and down on
his strong chubby legs on Grandpa or Grandma’s lap or simply being held lovingly
by Mom or Dad. I did hear him
really cry at bedtime as his parents are trying to introduce him to going to sleep
in his crib at night on his own.
That is hard and Austin hasn’t quite mastered that yet.
Visiting for a few days was a
reminder of what a difficult job it is to be parents who work full time at jobs. It takes patience and devotion in spite
of sleepless nights – organization, planning, and flexibility to change course
in an instant. I found myself wondering
if we once had the energy to do all of this when Hayden was a baby. Did we really go through days
sleep deprived but still crazy about our son?” Of course we did.
But then 37 years ago we had much more energy than we do now.
While Austin was the highlight of
our weekend in Washington, so was a rare family gathering of cousins who all happened
to be in town when we were. Jess
and Hayden welcomed everyone to a barbecue on Saturday afternoon. Megan, Hayden’s first cousin, and
husband Cruz and 2 ¾ year old Noah just happened to be visiting the East coast
from California and they came.
Cory, Hayden’s second cousin and husband Roberto and 1 ½ year old Arthur
who have been in D.C. for several years but are moving to Texas next month also
came. Megan and Cory who are
second cousins, grew up in California but had never met before and so it was a
memorable reunion. Roberto and
Cruz discovered they both graduated the same year from U. of Texas from the
engineering school.
Thank goodness for Hayden’s backyard which is small but a
rare amenity on Capitol Hill. We
had three little boys – at three different stages all being watched by their
parents as we visited, took lots of photos, and had a lovely time
together. And I just basked in the
fun of watching it all - this generation of smart, well educated, and fun young
people all enjoying each other and their children .
Our weekend flew by and I stored up
as much “Austin time” as I could - cuddling and holding him so that I can still
feel him in my arms now that I’m home again. As we drove back from Greenville, S.C. airport on Monday
night through the lush green mountains to Asheville, Art and I talked about
what perfect parents Hayden and Jessica are. We agreed that it is wonderful for Austin to be cared for by
an African nanny and learning to share with Kyle who is growing up in a gay
family. Austin will truly be
in tune with the 21st century world where people of all ethnicities,
nationalities, beliefs and lifestyles are living closely together and accepting
one another.
Mostly, we basked in feeling
appreciated and loved by Jessica and Hayden who always include us and make us
part of their lives. As grandparents it’s nice to know they will always welcome
family and keep their home open just as they did last weekend when we had our
cousin reunion. While world news
often seems dire we come back from our Washington D.C. visits with optimism
about the generations to come – especially about future generations of
Aaronsons!
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